Growing Old Together

Monday, January 28, 2008 |

Ok- this is a totally cheesy and probably preachy thought from a non-married person about being married. Just a warning so you can bail now......

The President and prophet of my church died last night and I have been thinking alot about him today and last night while trying to sleep. I was really tired last night (and right now) but I still stayed awake a while and just thought back on things I learned from him. I have to say that even on hearing of his death I didn't feel very sad because I know he's in heaven with his wife who died a few years ago. I really thought that his death would affect me more since he's like an institution in my church, but the reality is- I am SO glad he can be with his wife.

How amazing is it that of all the things I can think of about him my absolute favorite thing to remember is how cute he and his wife were? I remember being on my mission in Argentina and even in South America there were guys in their 20's(fellow missionaries) who had pictures of President Hinckley and his wife inside their scriptures or taped to folders or in frames -not to show people who were new to our church who our prophet was, but for their own personal use. To be able to look at that picture and feel that all was right with the world and that becoming like them was the ultimate goal they had in life. To grow old and be in your 90's walking down a street holding hands with your spouse -sunny smiles on your faces.

It also kind of puts a perspective for me on the stupid things I have heard recently from friends and acquaintances about relationships. Just today at school one of my older classmates (who I happen to know has been happily married for almost 30 years) suggested to one of my very christian friends that there is no need to get married to her boyfriend and that marriage is pointless. She defended herself but it's hard to stand your ground when everyone around you has such a worldly and selfish perspective about life and love. They all seem to be out for themselves and have a list of physical /monetary / status qualifications that will hopefully result in a relationship with a 5 yr shelf life if you're lucky. What on earth has this world done to itself? Who can honestly say they are better off with a bunch of relationships that last a few years(or months, days, minutes...) and have immediate gratification? Do you expect your last little fling in your 50's or 60's to really adore your wrinkles and old lady clothes(for men -insert santa belly and bald head into this argument) and conveniently stay with you till the end? Honestly? Part of the joy of sitting in the rockers is looking over to the person next to you and having memories of them being there when your kids were born, when your parents died, coming to the hospital when you got in the car accident, making you dinner when you were sick. Knowing that they were there for you and you were there for them. That's what gives the sense of contentment...not just having a warm body to pay the bills in your old age with their pension plan. People are meant to have a companion, a friend.......not a disposable accessory. (I'm sure I will write about my views of people having kids as accessories at a later time. Ug.)

I really hope my friend stays strong in her views that there is something better, far more precious that is worth waiting for. The decisions you make now affect your future so much. Pick the one with serious rocker potential. Not the one who your accountant recommends. Not Mr. Right-Now.

Ok my preaching is done. Can I get an Amen Hallelujah?

Ha. I knew the choir was listening.


Alison said...

Amen Hallelujah! ;) You know, I felt the same way about President Hinckley dying. I was happy for him to be with his wife and friends again.