Inside the KS Acting Studio - Paypal Accepted

Monday, March 22, 2010 |

Welcome dear friends and sit yourself down in a nice comfy folding metal chair. Today is the first and only class in the course you recently signed up for through our studios ....."Pouting your way through film : a study of the acting style of Kristen Stewart

Normally, I'd say grab a drink and snack but in all reality- "not eating" is key and this won't take very long.
Throughout the early 2000's primarily the world began to see the styling of an acting genius named Kristen Stewart. From her uncredited role as "ring toss girl" in The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas, to her roles in Catch That Kid, Zathura, or What Just Happened? she took Hollywood by storm with the subtlety and mystery in her acting. "Was she just acting?" some experts would question as they watched her films. Ohhhh was she.
As a privileged child with a screenwriter mother and a producer father you would think she had been exposed to training.
As these quotes demonstrate, she has put much of herself into her characters.
On the subject of working in smaller indie movies she had this thought "It's your movie and you can do anything you want, and nobody's going to have anything to say." Indeed, you do leave them speechless with your talent my dear.
"Acting is such a personal thing, which is weird because at the same time it's not." With this quote K shows how her acting both demonstrates that SHE is NOT the character but at the same time.....who IS the character?? Who IS anyone really. She then said "You should have the opportunity to be more than one person with different people - because you have that within you" Inner potential for multiple personalities......or for acting all the time with everyone- hard to tell which prospect I find more pleasant.
"I don't want to make movies for kids, and I don't want to make movies for adults either." The wise critic asks herself- are Kristen's movies really FOR anyone?
She has been pursued by paparazzi and asked many questions but in her view"Really, I'm incredibly disjointed and not candid. Just in general, my thoughts tend to come out in little spurts that don't necessarily connect." I just knew some of her lines were meant to be in a stream of consciousness.
And for those of you who thought the acting was joy enough.....she has plans to conquer the world with her writing. "I mean, I definitely will always do what I've been doing. I've also started taking a lot of pictures, and they help the writing. The pictures help the writing. I mean, I want to make books. I want to take pictures and then write all over the pictures. And then I don't have to say a complete story, because I have the picture, and I have just a word." Apparently these will be children's books or coffee table graffiti books? Maybe a new genre entirely.
Ahh the gems of knowledge we have learned from our esteemed K. Stewart. But you all came her not just to learn the theory but the practice of Kristen.
Let us begin.
1. Moisturize the lips. Carmex, vaseline, lip matters not which one. But they need to be in pouting shape. No peelies or crackies!
2. Those pearly whites must be in evidence. I mean HUGE. If you cannot see the front teeth at all times, from any camera angle how will you emote??? No one wants to see tears or forehead crinkles....what the eye is drawn to in any emotional scene is the slight glare off the front teeth and how you use your lips to display them.
3. Now you must choose how to emphasize the lip/tooth connection. You may bite the lip at center to be coy or torn apart, bite to one side to show confusion or shyness. You may pull the full lower lip up to partially cover the teeth while mouth still slightly gapes open to annoyance.
4. If there is to be a kissing scene you shall lick your lips at the approach and then bite them. Even if this is an unwanted kiss, you will still show how pouty and inviting and moist your lips are.
5. These rules also apply to child actors. It is never too early to start the lip biting.
6. NEVER smile. You lose all credibility as an actor. No character in any movie is truly happy anyways. If you smile it looks like you're too connected to the part and not busy being half personal and half distant.
7. Having sloppy hair cut to fall over your eyes is essential. You can bite your lip all you want but if it is not followed by a toss of the locks, what have you really expressed?
8. Don't open you eyes too wide. Having a deadened stare or even better....a vacant one shows depth and history.
9. The tone of your voice should be deep and low. If the amount of emotion you need to display calls for loud shouting and or screaming which will fall into a womanly or girly tone....then only be as loud as you can in a low tone. No valley girl or breathless sighs. Of course if the director absolutely forces you to scream...say if you're having a bad dream that seems like an acid trip where your voice comes out of Nearly Headless Ed's head....then you can scream but you must follow it up with some manly grunts of reassurance that you're fine back in the low tones again. If a word is meant to be shouted, you can emote it in a lower tone successfully by repeating it many times over and over. Instead of NOOOOOO!!!! deeply intone No No No and shake your locks a few times for emphasis. Then say No No No again. More lock shaking. And repeat until someone says cut. The police have told me this is super effective and what most women do when they need to fight off attackers. A low no is the way to go. Catchy right?
10. I can't emphasize to you enough how tasty your lips are and how much you can't stop chewing on them.
I hope you have learned today class and opened your minds. Maybe you too can play Joan Jett or Bella Swan, or any one of various famous 13 yr old emo boys with the skills you have learned today. Your range is as unlimited as your talent.
Best Wishes.
The Staff of the KS Acting Studio
PS- Don't forget to take a poster of the star herself for inspiration.


Alison said...

I love-->"The wise critic asks herself- are Kristen's movies really FOR anyone?"

Altered emo bunny picture is greatness!

Rhia Jean said...

I pretty much love every word you typed. The end.